2020

 

I learned a whole heap in 2020.  Lockdown was both my highlight and lowlight.   It was tough, but I coped well considering and managed to occupy myself so I didn't go insane.  It made me appreciate the little things i completely take for granted like freedom and variety.  I was incredibly grateful to be living in Kaikoura at the time and have housing sorted and a job I could do from home, and for Emily for volunteering to move in with me so neither of us would be alone.  Most mornings I'd go for a walk to the waterfront and sit and admire the view, and we would go for lunchtime walks and notice new things each time. I am exceptionally grateful to be living in a country where the government are competent, caring and courageous and the people mostly follow the rules and use common sense.  Life has been back to normal for the best part of 6 months for us and it has been wonderful.  I almost think we should lockdown for a month every year, to take that opportunity to slow down and appreciate the things in life we take for granted. 

This year I learned that my own space is a requirement for me to be happy.  I'm not sure if this is a new development, or something I've always needed but have never really done, but I have got to the point that if I had to choose, I'd rather live alone than with flatmates.  Which is laughable when I look back at the time I house sat for 6 weeks in Auckland about 4 years ago and would call my friends every day asking them to come round because I was lonely. Haha. There is something so sacred about having your own little space to retreat to and hide in - when you're not feeling great mentally, or you want to wander round naked, or you want to cook and sing your heart out at the same time, or you want to fart or poo with the door open- it is just lovely having your own space to do that!!! 

The last few months have been exceptionally busy and I could feel the stress inside my body.  I was wound up very tight and was worried I would snap at times but I managed to hold it together.  Work was infuriating for a variety of reasons but we made it to the end. I worked nearly every weekend in the last month - we had four events in two weeks that we were in charge of.  In our last week we had a poroporoaki, where the runanga (local Maori council) said goodbye to us.  It was quite emotional,  no one knew what to expect and we were asked to say a few words in front of everyone.  There was an awkward few moments where people looked around to see who was going to speak - we were unsure if it was an open floor or more aimed at senior staff.  After a few people had stood up and spoken, I jumped up.  I wanted to thank everyone for their help with the community event I was project managing - I was blown away with the amount of staff who volunteered their time to help with it and people just get shit done and help out - it is amazing.   I ended up getting very emotional and had to sit down quite quickly and made others cry too, oops!!

The staff party was eventful- a medical incident where a guy needed CPR and a defibrillator, a friend getting so wasted she turned into a bowling ball and was knocking everyone over, another friend who was so drunk she slept with a boy even though she's gay, and all the boys being extremely pervy and gross. 

I finished up work on the Friday, had the most wonderful evening in the pub with some new local friends (seriously where were they the last year?!) packed up my house and drove down to Christchurch.  I thought I would feel sadder than I did, but I think because of the stress of the last few months and the amount of goodbyes I've said, I was a bit over it. 

I unpacked a bit, and the following day headed to Auckland to meet Lu.  Conveniently Amy was about too so I got to see her, Colin and Dylan before driving up to the Bay of Islands for a week on Lu's partners boat.  It was pretty lovely- mostly great weather,  fabulous food from Lu, lots of swimming and hiking on different islands and a bonus pod of dolphins came to join on the last day.  Nature count included:

1 ray
2 little blue penguins 
1 lonely dolphin 
1 shark
A saddleback
A north island Robin

A brown teal duck 
A whale carcass 

A pod of not lonely dolphins

I then drove down to Auckland, emptied out my storage unit ready for the stuff to be transported to Nelson, caught up with Rosie and flew back to Chch. 

I had one day to unpack and repack before driving to Wanaka the next day for Rhythm and Alps - a music festival where Fat Freddy's Drop were playing.  I was actually quite disappointed - maybe its because I was the sober driver, but I just didn't have a great time.  People all around me were wasted - I saw people rubbing cocaine onto their gums and passing pill bags around and the music was so loud it hurt my ear drums.  I realise this all makes me sound like a nanna, but I'm glad I went and know not to go again. Haha. 

For new years we hiked into Mt Aspiring hut, only a 2.5h hike from the carpark.  It was beautiful and we were very lucky with the weather.  We struggled to stay awake till midnight and went to sleep shortly after countdown! A chill day in Wanaka followed, and now I'm in Dunedin because Wanaka weather looked crap for the next week - though it isn't much better in Dunedin and flooding on the highway has me trapped here for the next day. I havent spent much time in Dunners - apart from one time 5 years ago when I was travelling and went on a night out during freshers week, got drunk and made out with my travel buddy in a local park.  Not my proudest moment but one I fondly remembered when I drove past said park earlier! I was slightly horrified at the lack of tree coverage though...maybe they've cut down some since I was last here?!

Resolutions for 2021 include less overthinking, less social media/phone time in general, more self care, more reading books, more exercise, more adventures, more friends and more permanence.  I'd also like to try and do something new every quarter- maybe the ukulele, wood work, pottery etc. I'll do some research and see what's out there!  I'd also love to get on the property ladder so once I have a job sorted I'll speak to a mortgage advisor.  Prices are creeping up every day though so I'm trying to not get too wrapped up in the idea incase it isn't tenable. Only time will tell! 

I've gotten really into learning recently. On the boat Lu had a bunch of New Zealand Geographic magazines and I fell in love with them - they are beautifully curated and very interesting and I learned heaps.  I've treated myself to a year subscription and I'm looking forward to getting them in the mail every few months!  I've also downloaded some episodes of The Psychology Podcast which I am finding interesting.  There is a whole bunch of stuff I find fascinating now but when I was at school it bored me, mainly because I couldn't see an application for it.  I guess as I have got older I can see how all these things fit into life and how they can help.  Psychology is especially interesting- from a personal perspective when I had my breakup, I turned to a lot of self help books which really helped me understand some of my thoughts and feelings, and from an external perspective I can see how psychology can help in things like the covid response and how different communication styles have led to different outcomes in different countries.  So 2021 I will keep learning and keep listening to podcasts that interest me.  

Ok that's enough of an update for now! It actually didn't take as long as I thought it would to write, so maybe I'll try update the  blog more often?!?!?